is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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