Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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