he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
