I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize