3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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