hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize