Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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