Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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