Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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