This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
