Define "chronic" masturbator.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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