Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
