Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
he puts the penis in happiness.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
