how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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