so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
