I am in a vortex of obligation.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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