Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER