Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking

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(732): I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking http://tfl.nu/678a

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(281): View more from Texas

I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16

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(281): I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16 http://tfl.nu/rugk

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(425): View more from Washington

You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.

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(425): You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left. http://tfl.nu/zkuy

Replies (20) Good night (1583) Bad night (5724)
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(410): View more from Maryland

Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!

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(410): Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA! http://tfl.nu/7pku

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god

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(304): Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god http://tfl.nu/7ezr

Replies (21) Good night (6323) Bad night (779)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."

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(918): at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes." http://tfl.nu/aef0

Replies (11) Good night (652) Bad night (3008)
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(518): View more from New York

All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss

(301): View more from Maryland

OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?

(518): View more from New York

Doritoesssssss

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(518): All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss (301): OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with? (518): Doritoesssssss http://tfl.nu/528p

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(914): View more from New York

all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is

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(914): all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is http://tfl.nu/2h7o

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(214): View more from Texas

He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks

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(214): He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks http://tfl.nu/xm8f

Replies (6) Good night (1160) Bad night (651)
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(509): View more from Washington

you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.

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(509): you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever. http://tfl.nu/fzjz

Replies (10) Good night (783) Bad night (2295)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?

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(304): well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out? http://tfl.nu/ogsn

Replies (9) Good night (1397) Bad night (645)
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(763): View more from Minnesota

My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which

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(763): My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which http://tfl.nu/haqi

Replies (3) Good night (662) Bad night (966)
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(561): View more from Florida

I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.

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(561): I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished. http://tfl.nu/wm2d

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(503): View more from Oregon

I like the wholesome side of you

(571): View more from Virginia

I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.

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(503): I like the wholesome side of you (571): I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots. http://tfl.nu/22ah

Replies (3) Good night (1459) Bad night (371)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?

(1-715): View more from Wisconsin

I think that about sums it up, actually.

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(715): I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain? (1-715): I think that about sums it up, actually. http://tfl.nu/mxnz

Replies (10) Good night (977) Bad night (260)

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