I accidentally had phone sex last night
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I can't put those talents on a resume
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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