I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I think your dad took our porno
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
