I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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