Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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