her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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