6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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