In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
