i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
My feet surprised me
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
