he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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