sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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