yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize
