I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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