I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
