And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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