remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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