Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.