I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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