it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Randomize
