2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
