and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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