STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
