Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
