Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
