Me. At least after what I've been through.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
