Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
