it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
You left your phone here
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