"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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