He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
