there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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