Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
