In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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