Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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